More ‘Tech’ Support

Sorry it’s a bit long, but you can’t see the idiocy if I edit it too much.

Call#3:

Frznagn : Clicking/tapping/zapping noise. This is my 3rd time here. I found the problem. The last rep said to swap video cards and I did. No more noise. How do I get a replacement video card?
[An agent will be with you shortly.]
[You are now chatting with Ruben S .]
Ruben S : Welcome to HP Total Care for desktop support. My name is Ruben S. Please give me a few moments while I review your issue description.
Ruben S : Hi Frznagn
Frznagn : Hello
Ruben S : Please allow me 3 minutes to go through the previous session you had with us.
Frznagn : Ok.
Ruben S : AS I understand, after you installed another video card on the system, the system is working properly without creating the clicking sounds, and you would now like to replace the original card, am I right?
Frznagn : Yes.
Frznagn : I swapped it twice just to be sure.
Ruben S : Did you try puttin in the original card back too, does the clicking sound come back when you do this?

(I said I did this twice!)
Frznagn : Yes.
Frznagn : I did it twice just to make sure it wasn’t just a fluke.
Ruben S : Thank you Frznagn for your understanding and your patience.
Ruben S : May I confirm the product no and serial no of the system, is it xxx and xxx?

(sure, why not? I’ve only done this twice before!)
Frznagn : model xxx, product xxx, serial xxx
Ruben S : Which operating system are you using Windows XP or Windows VISTA?
Frznagn : vista home pro 64 bit
Ruben S : Thank you for the details.
Frznagn : yw
Ruben S : Frznagn, there are two options we can try to resolve this issue, I can give you an update which you can install on the pc for the video card. Although the update is not specific to this issue, updates are released to resolve minor flaws, and are mentioned as specific to certain issues. This update may resolve the issue you are facing. Alternatively I can check the warranty and take the videoc card back for exchange.

(has upgrading drivers ever helped with a noise problem? Seriously!)
Frznagn : I keep this updated pretty well. Which update? I have the latest bios and I can check the nvidia drivers.
Ruben S : I will suggest you try the video card update because the video card which I will be sending as replacement will be the of the same type, in case it will be resolved by the update only, the issue can reccur again, and then the update will again be necessary
Ruben S : I am sorry our messages crossed, please see my last statement too. Meanwhile I will share with you the update link
Frznagn : ok
Ruben S : http://xxx
Ruben S : Please click on the link for the update to open the page
Frznagn : Ok, downloaded.
Ruben S : In case the issue still persists, please try reinstalling the drivers for the video card, try the update again and check, and if the issue persists, we would have no other choice but to go ahead and replace it.
Ruben S : Shall I now give you the video drivers too ?
Frznagn : Sure.
Ruben S : Please go into device manager(click start > type in device manager and click the selection when it appears), right click on the video drivers (it should be named as NVIDIA GeForce xxxx ) and select uninstall . double click on the downloaded file for the video card to install the new drivers and restart teh system.
http://xxx
Ruben S : *the
Frznagn : Ok.
Ruben S : Once reinstalled, again update the driver using the 1st link
Frznagn : Ok.
Ruben S : Frznagn, when you disconnect this chat session, there will be an option to save it, please save it, you can then use the saved chat transcript to perform the steps and for reference.
Frznagn : Ok. Thx!

(guess what? It didn’t work!)

And call #4:

Frznagn : 4th visit. Last rep said to update video drivers to stop noise. It didn’t help. I did find the problem. The fan on the video card is bad. Need help to get video card replaced.
[An agent will be with you shortly.]
[You are now chatting with Venkata .]
Venkata : Welcome to HP Total Care for Desktops. My name is Kashyap.How are you today ?
Frznagn : Ok. Just getting dinner.
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : Please provide me two minutes while go through your issue.
Frznagn : Ok.
Venkata : Thank you.
Venkata : Thank you for your patience.
Frznagn : Anytime.
Venkata : I see that your fan is getting noise. Is that right?

(genius!)
Frznagn : Yes.
Venkata : I know it is quite frustrating. Let me see how I could help you resolve this issue.
Venkata : May I have your computer’s product number and serial number please?

(sure, fourth time is a charm, right?)

Frznagn : product-xxx Serial- xxx
Venkata : Thank you for providing the product number and serial number.
Venkata : Please give a minute while I quickly go through your product details.
Frznagn : Ok.
Venkata : Thank you.
Venkata : Thank you for your patience.
Frznagn : You’re welcome.
Venkata : Could you please let me know Since when have you been experiencing this issue?
(guess that wasn’t in the previous chats?)
Frznagn : Since yesterday.
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : I see that you are using Windows Vista operating system. Is that right?
Frznagn : Yes, 64 bit.

(deja vu all over again)
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : What has changed since it last worked successfully? Have you made any hardware or software installation on the computer?
Frznagn : No. When I was feeling around for the noise, I accidentally touched the fan and the noise stopped. It is the fan on the video card that is making the noise.
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : Could you please give me a detailed description of the problem, include any error messages you received or the events that led to the error?
(uh, didn’t you read the previous chat? Or do you have short-term memory problems? And why does it matter? I just told you the problem!)
Frznagn : No errors. Just a clicking/ticking noise. Very erratic. Sounds like Morse Code most of the time.
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : Have you tried any troubleshooting steps before contacting us?

Frznagn : Yes. You are the fourth person I have chatted with.

Venkata : Ok.

(uh, didn’t you check the previous chat?)

Frznagn : When I touch the fan on the video card, the noise goes away. The last rep said that if the drivers don’t fix the problem, then the video card needs to be replaced.

Venkata : Could you please tell me the steps you have followed earlier?

(didn’t you already check on this?)
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : May I have a two minutes, while I research this issue?
(must be nap time because you sure haven’t checked on anything yet!)
Frznagn : Sure.
Venkata : Thank you.
Frznagn : I shut down the system, disconnected all cables then put them back on and restarted. I updated all the video card drivers too.
Frznagn : I put another video card in this system and the noise stopped.
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : Thank you for your patience.
Frznagn : Ok.
Venkata : Do you have the vaccum cleaner?

(I always have a vacuum cleaner next to me when I’m on the computer)
Frznagn : I have one. But I have already cleaned the fan on the video card.
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : Have you cleaned the slot for the video card also?
Frznagn : No, but the slot is not making the noise.

(I’ve only had it for three months, it can’t be THAT dusty!)
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : May I have a two minutes, while I research this issue?
(another nap?)
Frznagn : Sure.
Venkata : Thank you.
Venkata : Thank you for your patience.
Venkata : Are you sure that the fan making noise is the video card fan?

(are you sure you can comprehend English? I did state this many times!)
Frznagn : Yes. I touched it when the noise was happening and it quit each time. I took the video card out and put another one in and there was no noise. 100% sure it is the video card.
Venkata : Ok.
Venkata : No problem I’ll definetely help you with that.
Frznagn : Thanks!
Venkata : As your computer is still under warranty, you can get it replaced.
Frznagn : Cool!
Venkata : Please provide me five minutes while I raise a service request for you.
Frznagn : Ok.
Venkata : Thank you.
Venkata : Thank you for your patience.
Venkata : I need some details to raise a service request.
Venkata : Could you please confirm the phone number to contact you and the best time to contact you?
Frznagn : 907 xxx-xxxx. x:30 local to midnight. And at work from x:00 to x:00 at 907 xxx-xxx
Venkata : Thank you for providing the details.
Venkata : Please note down the service ticket number:xxx and Interaction ID:xxx
Venkata : You will get a call from our supervisor to confirm the replacement request within 48 working hours.
Frznagn : ok
Venkata : Is there anything else I can help you with?
Frznagn : not today.
Venkata : Merry Christmas to you and your family in advance Frznagn.
Frznagn : thx u2!!!

(guess what call never came? Surprised?)

Call#lost count:

Frznagn : Video card fan is bad. Already contacted support. Said someone would call me to confirm address and shipping information. I have had no phone calls. Can someone send me a replacement card before the noise drives me crazy?
[An agent will be with you shortly.]
[You are now chatting with Harry N .]
Frznagn : Hello
Harry N : Welcome to HP Total Care for HP Desktop Computers. My name is Harry N. Please give me a few moments while I review your problem description details.
Frznagn : Ok
Harry N : Thank you for being online
Harry N : Hi Frznagn
Harry N : Please give me five minutes while I review your previous chat sessions with us and get back to you with appropriate information. Is that okay?
Frznagn : Ok.
Harry N : Thank you
Harry N : Thank you for being online. I understand that you receive a loud grinding noise from the video card on your computer. Also, once you replace the video card, you do not receive any sound from the computer. Am I correct?
Frznagn : It’s like fast morse code, and yes- when I replaced the video card the noise stopped.
Harry N : Thank you for the confirmation
Frznagn : Anytime.
Harry N : Frznagn, this issue could occur due to defective video card fan.

(NO SHIT! Who’d thought that???)
Frznagn : I know it is the fan. That’s what the last person said.
Harry N : Okay. May I know the model number and serial number of your comptuer to check the warranty status of your computer?
Harry N : You can find them on the sticker at the back of the CPU tower or by pressing CTRL, ALT and S keys at the same time.
Frznagn : Model: xxx Product: xxx Serial: xxx
Harry N : Thank you for the information
Frznagn : You’re welcome.
Harry N : May I know the date of purchase of the computer?
Frznagn : Sure, it was… late September or early October. Not sure of the exact date. I’d have to find the receipt. I ordered it online at HP’s website.
Harry N : Thank you for the information
Frznagn : October 1st is the earliest I see our files on the system.
Harry N : Alright. Frznagn, I am sorry to inform you that the date of purchase and the expiration date of warranty has not been updated in our database related to the serial number and product number you have provided above.

(funny, all the other tech’s saw that it was still under warranty.)
Harry N : Sorry for the inconvenience caused. Therefore, I will create a service to ship you a replacement video card or set up bench repair to replace the video card in our Service Center, if you are not comfortable replacing it on your computer. Then, I will provide you the Service Ticket number for the service
Frznagn : I can replace it myself without problems. I have 8 computers in my house.
Harry N : You can fax the proof of purchase to our Proof of purchase (POP) Department so that they will update the warranty status of your computer in our database.

(sure, ordering it on your website and registering it on the day I got it means nothing then? what good is it if you can’t tell when I bought it and when the warranty is valid?)

Harry N : Perfect. Then, I will create a service to ship you a replacement video card.
You can fax the proof of purchase to our Proof of purchase (POP) Department so that they will update the warranty status of your computer in our database.
You can get back to us after 24 to 48 hours with the Service Ticker number that I will provide you after creating the service.
Harry N : This is because it takes 24 to 48 business hours to update the warranty status of the computer. Once the warranty status of your computer is updated, we will process the Order further and provide you with Customer Service Order (CSO Number) for the shipment of replacement video card.
Frznagn : Ok, so whit is the Service Ticker number?
Harry N : Please stay connected while I go ahead and create a service to ship you a replacement video card. I need five minutes. Is that okay?
Frznagn : Yes.
Harry N : Sure. Please give me five minutes so that I will create a service and provide you with the Service Ticket number for the service.
Harry N : May I please have the following details to set up a service?
Name in full:
Postal Address (Including Zip Code):
Area Code and Phone Number:
Email Address:
Frznagn : Frznagn xxx. Anchorage, AK 99xxx 907-xxx-xxxx Frznagn@xxx.xxx
Harry N : Thank you for the information
Frznagn : Ok.
Harry N : Please give me five minutes. I am in the process of creating service ticket.
Frznagn : Ok.
Harry N : Thank you
Harry N : Thank you for being online. The Service Ticket number for the service set up for shipping replacement video card is xxx
Frznagn : Ok, so where do I fax the proof of service?
Harry N : You need to send the following details along with the Purchase receipt.
1. Name:
2. Email address:
3. Phone number:
4. Serial number of the PC:
5. Service Ticket number

The POP can be faxed to: 800-xxx-xxxx . Please fax the message at your earliest convenience in the said format.
Harry N : You can even email the proof to the following e-mail id:

hp.pop@mail.support.hp.com
Frznagn : Ok, sounds good.
Frznagn : Thanks for your help!
Harry N : You are most welcome. Is there any other technical queries that I may assist you with today?
Frznagn : Not today. Thanks!!

Just where do they find these dolts at anyways??? Note to HP- Hire some kids from the US that actually have worked on a computer!

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One Response to More ‘Tech’ Support

  1. frznagn says:

    This is for my wife’s business. The tech guru gave us the specs for the system. Mac was not included. However, I am giving it serious thought for my next system. Since you like to type- convince me on why I should spend my money for something that is more expensive and has fewer software choices. And their mouse only has ONE button. I like two buttons with the scroll wheel.

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